To be able to even start thinking about cultivating self-love you need to redirect your focus from others to yourself. However, we’re not talking here about developing cynical self-centredness and become a self-absorbed, egotistic and selfish individual who cares only about themselves and doesn’t consider others. Because that would be extremely toxic and extremely harmful to one’s wellbeing.
What I mean instead is, that you should make yourself your number one priority. Not your ONLY priority but your number one priority. That’s the main difference between healthy self-interest and selfishness that many people seem to ignore.
Healthy egoism starts with self-reflection, self-awareness, discovering your personal core values and identifying your own needs. When you discover what makes you happy, satisfied and fulfilled you will be able to create intimate relationships with others. And isn’t it what we all want?