So before I properly begin, I wanted to give a little disclaimer that I do not believe that we can defeat self-doubt and fear once and for all. I think that it’s normal to have a little bit of self-doubt going on especially when things didn’t go as planned. Sometimes, despite our best efforts we fail to achieve a goal. And when it happens it’s completely normal to have a little bit of self-doubt.
The problem starts when self-doubt and self-limiting beliefs sabotage your progress. To prevent that you need to learn to manage your self-doubt and reduce the self-limiting beliefs that keep you stuck. To achieve a certain level of confidence and resilience you don’t need to eliminate self-doubt completely. What you need to do instead is to learn to manage your self-limiting beliefs and take action even if you don’t feel ready yet. And to help you with that in today’s post I’m sharing with you 8 simple but extremely powerful ways to deal with self-doubt and start moving forward.
Table of Contents
A Little Bit Of Self-Doubt
Stop Measuring Your Worth In Your Achievements
Let’s start with an uncomfortable truth. Achievements no matter how spectacular don’t constitute our self-worth. They are “only” visible results of the hard work we’ve put into accomplishing specific goals. But becoming successful in achieving goals does not increase our worth as human beings. And of course, the fact that we didn’t accomplish some goal does not decrease our worth or value.
While it’s normal to feel proud about your accomplishments, basing your self-worth on your achievements is a prescription for failure. Because you will be doing only the things that you know you can achieve pretty easily while avoiding projects that may not create immediate success. And that’s not how you make progress in life. Actually, it’s the exact opposite. The superpower is in the mistakes. Failure is more important than success because it provides a learning experience, makes you thought and gives you the opportunity to adjust your mindset and unlock your full potential.
Measuring your worth in your achievements makes you think that your worth is conditional and highly dependent on your accomplishments. Not to mention that when things don’t go as you panned you start doubting yourself. And this is how a vicious circle of negative thinking is being created. To avoid that you need to stop attaching your self-worth to tangible things and start cultivating self-compassion. Treat yourself as you’d treat your best friend.
Simplicity Is The Key To Success
Another powerful to overcome self-doubt is to prioritize and simplify your life, pretty much every aspect of it. I am sure you’ve already heard that simplicity is the key to success. (and the only remedy to confusion). But have you ever tried to apply this strategy to your every daily life? If not, it’s the perfect time to do that.
Mastering the art of making things much more complex than they ever need to be is what we all do to some extent. As if it was some kind of competition and who makes the simplest things the hardest wins.
As human beings, we have the tendency to overthink and overanalyze everything to the smallest details hoping that it will make things easier. But it’s exactly the opposite. Only by simplifying and prioritizing your tasks, activities and ideas, you will boost your self-confidence, develop laser-like focus and increase your chances of success.
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Face Your Fears
Self-doubt goes hand in hand with the fear of failure. They are literally best buddies, always ready to support each other. But the good news is that you can manage and reduce them both at a time. And to do that, you need to take action. Action is the remedy for the fear of failure and self-doubt. You need to prove to yourself (and others) that you can achieve your goals and the only way to do that is to take intentional action.
Action strengthens self-confidence, increase self-esteem and boosts motivation to keep moving forward. So start before you are ready. Try things that make you feel uncomfortable. Put yourself in challenging (but healthy) situations, breathe through discomfort, balance it out and feel this incredibly powerful adrenaline rush that boosts your confidence without you even noticing.
Fear of failing is terrifying until you realize that it’s just an illusion of the mind. What you are really afraid of is success. Why? Because success means a massive life change. And change is scary. To solution to that is to challenge yourself and try things that make you feel uncomfortable.
Stop analyzing everything you want to achieve to the nth degree because the chances you will take action decrease with every minute you waste on obsessive thinking on what can go wrong. Your time and energy are limited. What is not limited is your potential and the power of taking intentional action towards your goals.
Self-Love Is The Remedy
Love is the remedy for everything, right? Let’s see. Being in love boosts our immune system, activates our happy hormones, reliefs pain and increase energy when we’re suffering. Love gives us the motivation to work harder on ourselves, helps us to accomplish the impossible, dispels all doubts, gives meaning to our lives, adds joy to everyday experience, helps us find inner peace and true strength in difficult times. Love makes u grow in a deeper way. Love makes us come alive with happiness. That’s why we want, need and crave love so much. We pursuit it. And when we find it, we feel blessed.
Love – the magic cure for everything, however, is usually seen as an external thing to be found. Something that we need to search for. So we go out into the world hoping that we will find someone special completely forgetting about ourselves. That’s crazy! The first person to fall in love with is YOU! You are that special one! That’s why you should give yourself the love that you need and deserve!
Self-love is the remedy for self-doubt. If you love yourself first, then you make choices that will only improve your quality of life. Practising self-love helps you to build a strong and healthy relationship with yourself. When you love yourself you know that can always count on yourself no matter what happens. You learn to be your best friend and you truly enjoy your own company.
Practice Makes Confident
The truth is, doubt never really goes away. You will always have a little bit of self-doubt going on especially when trying new things, posing yourself new challenges and doing something for the first time. And that’s completely normal. Because if you’ve never done something before how could you feel 100% secure that you’re doing it right. Of course, you can always ask for advice, some guidance or genuine feedback from someone more experienced (in that particular area) than you. That would help but it will not take away all the self-doubt, uncertainty and fear.
Feeling 100% secure, self-confident and self-assured would mean achieving perfection and we all know that perfection does not exist. Besides, you don’t have to completely eliminate self-doubt. What you need to do instead is to build up your practice, improve your personal development skills and develop the action habit. In other words, you need to stop overthinking and start doing the things you need and want to do.
Practice makes perfect confident. And you can practice in private. For example, if you about to give a public speech or presentation for the first time and you feel nervous about it you should practice at home in front of the mirror. Be your own audience. Build your practice in the privacy and convenience of your own homes. That simple method will definitely help you to feel less nervous and more self-confident!
The Problem With Your Self-Talk Dictionary
The way you speak to yourself truly matters. Because, first of all, you are listening. Second, you probably believe everything you tell yourself, especially the negative stuff. And third, your self-talk creates your own reality and shapes your perception of yourself.
You think (talk to yourself) in terms of how you feel and you act based on your current mental state. That’s why when you constantly telling yourself that you cannot achieve something you probably won’t. Because if you don’t believe you will succeed what’s the point of even trying, right?
However, when you reprogram your mind to positive through positive self-talk your chances for success will increase dramatically. Not to mention that a positive mindset will help you to find your way through when things don’t do as planned.
Positive self-talk is a powerful tool for increasing your self-confidence, hacking your happiness, improve your problem-solving skills and motivating yourself to achieve your goals. So, if you’ve been talking to yourself in a nasty, unpleasant and unfriendly way, now it’s time to change this. Start practising positive self-talk, update your personal dictionary, pay attention to the tone of your inner dialogue and make sure to take 5 to 10 minutes every day to say out loud and write down positive affirmations.
Create A Favorable Environment
Are you unconsciously feeding your self-doubt with the negative environment, toxic relations or unhealthy sources of inspiration?
Oftentimes, we don’t even realize how much immediate surroundings, the environment in which we live or even habits that we practice every day affect our confidence and self-esteem. We choose the familiar because it makes us feel comfortable. Even if, in reality, we’re not feeling comfortable at all.
Overcoming self-doubt will be much easier if you create a favourable environment. It doesn’t have to be perfectly perfect but it should be more than tolerable. Life is not a picnic and sometimes you just need to accept the things we don’t like and co-exist with people who don’t want the best for you but it does not mean that you should let them bring you down.
Thus, if you want to overcome debilitating self-doubt focus on creating a more favourable environment, choose the people you spend your time with mindfully and search for the right source of inspiration and motivation.
Everything Is Menageable
Self-doubt arises when we’re unable to predict the exact outcome of the action we take or the decision we make. But the truth is we never know what results come of your actions. Sometimes, despite our best efforts, life has its own plan and the best we can do is to make the most of the situation.
Getting ready and have everything planned out to the nth degree is comfortable but not realistic. First of all, you never know what would be the outcome of your actions because there are many different outside factors you cannot control such as a political-economic system or a global pandemic we’re experiencing right now. Second, you never know what unexpected opportunities are waiting for you around the bend. (they present themselves only if you keep going). And finally, it is always possible to change direction in your life so what wouldn’t you want to exploit this opportunity?
A little chaos in life can be a good thing because it creates an opportunity to challenge your thinking and do something you never thought you could do. Everything in life is manageable. You can always figure out things as you go but only if you have a flexible mindset. The worst you can do is to sit back and wait for things to happen. Not only it will make you a passive observer of your own life but above all, it will drastically reduce your chances for a victory.
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Stay positive, be mindful and unlock your self-worth!