How To Figure Out What You Want In Life: 12 Simple Exercises.

how to figure out what you want


Table of Contents

Embark On The Journey Towards Your Dream Life

We live in a hectic, noisy and extremely chaotic world, where sometimes hear yourself think is nearly impossible. Constantly bombarded with external stimuli and information that our brain cannot even process we feel more and more disconnected from our true self. No wonder when someone asks us about our personal values, life purpose and passion we’re unable to answer.

Sometimes figuring out what you want in life seems to be a mission impossible. But everything changes when you have the right tools aka exercises to make that happen. So if you’ve been struggling to figure out what you want in life, what do you want to achieve and how do you want to feel, then continue reading this post to find your answers. 

It’s time to embark on the journey towards your dream life!


Before you start figuring out what you want in life you need to reflect on your present self, re-evaluate your present life and think about the current circumstances.

The purpose of this exercise is to truly understand who you are, how you feel about your present situation and how strong is your feeling of dissatisfaction so you can identify the areas of your life that need a boost. 

Practicing self-reflection will help you to become aware of the current version of yourself, determine the level of success that you achieve and take the right action to make real progress in your immediate future to feed your life purpose.

There are many different methods that will help you delve deeper into yourself and explore your consciousness, and depends entirely on you which one you will choose. But if you need some help, here are the top 3 simple but powerful exercises to do that:

  1. Use the Wheel of life
  2. Fill the Happiness / Unhappiness list
  3. Self-Reflection Questions 

Wheel Of Life & The Scale Of Fulfilment

Use the wheel of life worksheet to determine the level of your satisfaction in each area of your life. Choose from 1 to 10 how fulfilled you feel in a particular area.  

  • Health (healthy mindset, mental focus, nutrition, workout routine, quality rest)
  • Contribution & Spirituality (personal growth, self-improvement)
  • Environment / Personal Space (comfortable and safe home)
  • Relationships (deepen your relationships bond)
  • Family & Friends (quality time with your loved ones, creating memories)
  • Wealth & Finance (budgeting, financial goals, saving money, planning for the future)
  • Career / Job (Satisfaction With Work)
  • Fun & Adventure (Quality “me time”, Hobbies & Fun) 

FREE Wheel Of Life Worksheet

"Find out who you are and do it on purpose."

- Dolly Parton Tweet

FREE Happiness & Unhappiness List Worksheet

Questions To Ask Yourself

  1. What do I want to achieve in each area of my life?
  2. How do I want to feel?
  3. What people, things and experiences I want to attract?
  4. What skills I want to acquire and why?
  5. What do I need to do to improve life satisfaction?

Exercise Introspection

We live in the Burnout Hustle Culture where if you’re not working extremely hard, ideally, 80-100 hours a week you are either unambitious or you’re just procrastinating (who knows what’s worse). So we keep working, achieving and smashing our never-ending to-do list without even thinking about whether the things that we do are the exact things we should be doing.

In a world where everything is urgent and important all the time, it’s easy to confuse being a high performer with being an overachiever. And when it happens you fall into the trap of thinking that you‘re more a human DOING than a human BEING.

The solution to all of that madness is to pause for a moment and reflect on yourself, your values and your life purpose. When you figure it out, you’ll be able to choose the right path.

Finding the time to exercise introspection to learn more about yourself is essential in figuring out who you are and what’s your life purpose. 

Ask Yourself Self-Discovery Questions

self-discovery questions

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self-discovery questions

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Take A Personality Test

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The 16 personality types were created by Isabel Myers and Katharine Briggs to discover your strengths, hidden talents and unlock your full potential. No registration required! You will find this test HERE

Create An Anti-Vision

The purpose of creating an anti vision is to figure out what you don’t want in life so you can narrow down the possibilities by exclusion and identify risk and potential problems before they affect you.

Although this may sound contradictory, realizing what you don’t want can be the quickest way to get clarity on your vision and goals. It happens because we tend to make decisions based on how others expect us to perform in life. We base our life on other people’s expectations instead of living in alignment with our life purpose.

We copy the choices of others to get the same results as them. We act according to prevailing social standards and attitudes even if it leads to a simple mediocre life. And saddest of all, we give up on our dreams because others don’t believe in them. Creating an anti-vision for your life is an antidote to all of that.

The world is filled with endless possibilities, and you possess the ability to choose those that fit your personality and the kind of life you want to lead. “The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” So don’t follow other’s path to success, pave your own path.

Create an ANTI-vision for your life including every aspect of it. Set your ANTI-goals for every area of your life. Figure out WHAT you DON’T want to achieve and WHY you DON’T want certain results. Narrow down the possibilities that the modern world offers you so you can determine what you really want in life and start making YOUR dreams come true.

Create A Clear Vision Of Your Future

When setting a vision for your life start with a big picture of what do you want to achieve, who do you you want to become and how do you want to feel a year from now. Be specific and make your ideas as clear as possible. But remember that you can change your mind any time along the way and that’s ok. Sometimes life is unfolding better than planned and expected. And when unexpected opportunities happen, you should be at least consider taking advantage of them. 

I know that after everything that happened in 2020 you may not feel like creating an inspiring vision for your life. I get it. But the truth is, we’ve got only one life that moves pretty fast and if you won’t even try to make your dreams come true you will miss the only and unique opportunity to create the life you want to live.

“We are the creators of our lives and not the managers of our circumstances”. So don’t give up on your dreams only because you have obstacles in front of you. Let go of the expectations and opinions of others and focus on what YOU want for yourself. You have the power to consciously design your life, your reality and your experience.

Create an inspiring and captivating image of your future self that will give you a strong reason to get out of bed early in the morning even on those days when you wake up unmotivated and uninspired. Describe how do you want to feel and what do you want to achieve in every sphere of your life. Be specific and clear and courageous. 

“Make your life a masterpiece; imagine no limitations on what you can be, have or do.”

Figure Out Your Dream Life Workbook

Set Specific Goals

Once you have a clear mental picture of who do you want to be in the near future, it’s time to set goals that will help you to turn your vision into reality. But don’t just focus on one area of your life like career or physical health. Think holistically. Figure out what do you want to achieve in each area of your life.

Ask yourself what are your dreams and set SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-bound) goals to turn these dreams into realities. Identify the milestones that will mark your journey towards success to stay motivated and keep yourself accountable during the whole process of morphing into the best version of yourself. 

This process of setting clear goals will not only help you to refocus on what’s truly important for you but will also help you to regain full control over your life. Not to mention that knowing what you want to achieve in life will drastically increase your willpower and determination so much needed by everyone who wants to achieve success in life.

Set Intentions Behind Your Goals

Most people put all their energy and focus into setting goals while completely forgetting to set intentions behind their goals. I think it’s a huge mistake. Because while goals give our life clear direction, we need intentions to stay focus and keep moving forward to achieve our goals even in those days when we’re not feeling it.

Goals and intentions support and reinforce each other making the whole process of becoming the best version of yourself much easier and way more pleasurable. They are interdependent and together they guide you toward your dream life.

But let’s look closely at this interdependence.

A goal is an outcome, an external achievement or more simply, the desired result you want to accomplish in the future. While the intention is a way of living, a conscious choice you make on a daily basis that guides you through your personal transformation and goal achievement.

An intention is a motive behind your goal. Is the quality of consciousness and motivation which is going to determine the effect that occurs.

For instance, your goal may be to earn more money but the reason for this may be to impress your friends or you want to support your spouse who has some financial problems. So, an intention is your conscious “WHY”. You need THIS “WHY” to be able to push through mental and physical obstacles when they occur. And we all know that sooner or later some challenges will appear.

  1. Identifying the exact reason why you want to achieve a specific goal (a particular result of your daily actions)
  2. Start with the feeling or state you want to achieve once a specific goal is accomplished
  3. Think about how achieving a specific goal will change your life (your current version of yourself)
  4. Write your thoughts down on a piece of paper

Be More Intentional & Regain Your Focus

Living an intentional life means being proactive, using your inner power to create the reality you want and making conscious decisions and deliberate choices to ensure that you are going in the right direction. Because every second of your life you choose what to focus on. You may not be aware of this, but everything you do, think or say is solely the result of your conscious individual choice.

To control your life and become the master of your fate, you need to control what you pay attention to. That is why, if you constantly focus on what’s missing from your life and what went wrong in the past you will feel powerless, hopeless and depressed. But if you consciously redirect your thoughts on the things that you are grateful for and the difference you can make your entire life will improve immediately.

“Focus equals power” and living with intention is, without doubt, is the easiest way to use this power to turn your life into a masterpiece. So stop wasting your time, energy and attention on things that don’t bring value to your life and focus on what’s truly matters. Make a focused list of what you want to achieve, experience and do in 2021 and plan on how you’re going to accomplish that. Be specific. Be intentional. Control your focus and become the master of your fate.  


Leading Questions

  1. What are the things and activities I want to focus on in every sphere of my life?
  2. What is my source of inspiration?
  3. What motivates me to get out of bed in the morning?
  4. What are the things I do to make myself better when I have a really bad day?
  5. Create a bucket list of experiences and adventures you want to have in the near future

Bad Habits To Break

We know what’s best for us and what doesn’t serve our overall health and personal growth. We just pretend otherwise because it’s much easier and safe to live in our comfort zone, where everything is well known, familiar, and under control. But this sense of safety and security is only illusory. Because the real reason we stay in a comfort zone is not the feeling of safety but the fear of the unknown. Even if the unknown would mean a great opportunity to grow personally and professionally.

So we make the same old choices every single day, but expecting different outcomes. We maintain bad habits for years only to avoid the discomfort and awkwardness of admitting to ourselves that we have bad habits. Because that would mean that we should do something about it. We do the same unhealthy things over and over expecting things to change without putting in any effort. Well, that won’t happen.

Nothing changes until you do. So if you want to live a healthy, happy, and fulfilling life you need to stop doing the things that serve neither your health nor growth.

Identify your bad habits and unhealthy thinking patterns, write them down on a piece of paper, and read them out loud. Then, imagine how breaking that old, stubborn habits would have a positive impact on your life. Not to mention that by getting rid of bad habits you make space for good ones.

  1. What habits are holding me back from success? 
  2. How do I unconsciously waste time every single day?
  3. What daily habits sabotage my health and wellbeing?
  4. What would I include in my STOP-DOING LIST?
bad habits to get rid of

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bad habits to get rid of

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Good Habits To Develop

Breaking bad habits is difficult even if you know perfectly well that they block your progress and sabotage your success. This is because bad habits address a certain need we have in life. They help us deal with difficult feelings, stressful situations, uncertainty, low self-esteem or fear of failure. We use them as a coping mechanism.

That’s why if you get rid of one bad habit that serves a certain purpose you leave an empty space ready to be filled with another bad habit. Because let’s face it, it’s easier to develop a bad habit than a good one.

In order to prevent it, you need to choose a substitute for every bad habit you want to break in order to go towards your dream life. Replacing a bad habit with a good habit that serves the same purpose and addresses the same need in your life will make it way easier to break bad behaviour patterns in your life. The transition will be smooth and enjoyable. 

  1. Look at your list of bad habits that you want to break.
  2. Think about what is a certain need you have in life a particular habit addresses
  3. Figure out what good habits would serve the same purpose as your bad habits
  4. Generate as many ideas as possible before considering any of them.
  5. Choose substitutes for your bad habits and think about how you could incorporate them into your daily life

Grab Your Free Printable Workbook

Stay positive

Be Mindful

and figure out who you are!

xo Kate

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8 thoughts on “How To Figure Out What You Want In Life: 12 Simple Exercises.

  1. Many times we think we know what we want in life only to realise that we don’t. Thanks for sharing this very detailed guide and plan on how to find oneself and goals in life, and the action steps to take.

    1. That is so true! In a world full of endless possibilities sometimes it’s hard to figure out want we want, what we like and who we want to become. But probably the most important thing to remember is that we can always pivot our goals and change the direction of our life. Life is not a test but an experiment and a true adventure. THANK You for your comment! I hope you’re doing well. Stay safe and have a wonderful week, Kevin!! 😃😉

      1. Well said. I really like this line “most important thing to remember is that we can always pivot our goals and change the direction of our life. Life is not a test but an experiment and a true adventure” I’ll quote you on this, it makes a good quote.

        I am well, thank you. Hoping you are well to. Many Blessings and have a wonderful week to😊

      2. True, well said. Unlike this line “most important thing to remember is that we can always pivot our goals and change the direction of our life. Life is not a test but an experiment and a true adventure” I’ll quote you on it, makes a good quote.

        I am well thank you, hoping you are well to. Blessings and have a good week to😊

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About Me

Hey, I’m Kate. I create content about a holistic approach to a meaningful life. On this platform, you will find resources on reaching YOUR goalstime management,  personal growth, & living your best life. 

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If I am not here it’s because I’m enjoying my creamy cappuccino in one of my favorite coffee shops… 😎

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